Dear Child of Mine

Shari Reinhart
Ghostwriter | Manuscript consultant | Editor | Aspiring vegan | Wannabe yogi |

Mar 06,2017

.Dear child of mine,

I wish I had all the knowledge in the universe to give you exactly what is required to have a perfect life.

I wish I could say, “I had all the answers to your deepest questions, all the provisions for your deepest longings and all the love in the world to fix whatever is hurting you.”

I wish I could delete some of the horrible things I said to you in my own personal moments of frustration. There were times when I was felt gravely inadequate as a parent. Forgive me that, for I was doing it all for the first time, no script, no manual, no degree… just me and dad winging it.

Dear child of mine,

I wish I could have been more fun but I was too busy taking the job of raising your precious life up very seriously. Sometimes I forgot to be fun too. I know now that my job was not to micro-manage or control your every move. You are not nor should you strive to be a mini version of me. I tried with every decision I had to make on your behalf, to consider you the person, you the separate human being from who I am so that I could be trusted to choose what is in your best interest. Until such time that you could make decisions for yourself. 

It was and never will be my intention to instill in you the belief that you must make me happy. Nor do I think you should ever have to seek my approval for the choices you make.

It is not my job to mold you. It is not my job to shelter you from reality of what life is like beyond the confines of your young protected life at home and school.

I don’t pretend to be perfect after all, I too am only human.

I am a person

I am imperfect

I am your mom and

I am trying

Dear child of mine,

Please know that as you grow up into who you are meant to be that I too, even as an adult am growing up right alongside you. I am learning from you, getting better as we journey this life as mother and child.

I do not have your heart and soul in my hand. Those are yours to sculpt. Each of you differently but with the same intensity. You are my world. You are my greatest teacher and I am but the vessel that gave this world the gift of you.

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