How Venting Can Make You Sexier

Moe DeCarlo
I show empowered, freedom-loving women how to get lasting love from an above average alpha male.
Relationships

May 31,2017

FRIEND: “Girl! You won’t believe what Jerome did again, girl! Let me tell you everything he did wrong…”

YOU (thinking): “Oh God…here she goes again about her boyfriend!”

Ever been there?

When it comes to expressing negative emotions, there are three types of people in this world. 

Blabbers, Sweepers, and Presents.

Blabbers” are people who vent too much about their problems. On and on, and over and over. That is not you. But you know someone like this.

Sweepers” are people who don’t vent enough. Typically they are motivated to avoid conflict or confrontation at all costs. Often they think they are doing a service by not expressing their frustrations, needs, or concerns.

Presents” are the Ideal. People who perfectly vent the right amount, at the right time, to the right person. Then return right back to an emotionally clean and “present” state. They address their frustrations efficiently without going on and on with too much negativity.

This article is for you if you’re a Sweeper.

What Is Venting?

I’ll define venting in my own words so we’re on the same page. To vent is to passionately express something negative in a written or spoken form, with no expectation of getting a solution.

Basically, get something “off your chest”. 

When we regularly vent our unprocessed emotions to a trusted friend (or trusted paper, as in a journal), we feel great, get an energy boost, and return to our natural loving nature as humans.

But venting can be done wrong…

Venting Too Much Is Bad

Ever heard the term “too much of a good thing”?

Well, that applies to venting too.

Even if the person you’re venting to is your best friend in the whole wide world, eventually they’ll get tired of hearing about it. Most people won’t even tell you when they’re turned off by too much ranting, they’ll just avoid you.

This is not you, so I’ll just go on….

Not Venting Is Even Worse

Q: What’s worse than someone who vents too much?

A: Someone who never vents, and instead remains bitter, withdrawn, and easily triggered.

The thing about Sweepers is their heart is usually in the right place. They “sweep things under the rug” because they don’t want to cause more problems with the person. So they sweep their needs “under the rug” and put on a smiley face mask.

This is a much bigger problem than it seems. 

In the short term, sweeping creates a “disconnect” between your energetic being and your physical one. If your man or friend is in tune with you, they can feel this disconnect when you sweep. This is when unnecessary conflict happens.

In the long term, repeated ongoing sweeping causes you to accumulate resentments, breaks down your love, and drains your life force energy. 

The worst case of long-term sweeping is developing a physical illness and even death, in the form of cancer.

So it’s a big deal to get this right.

Venting Options

Some people vent by writing in a journal. This is a quick and easy solution if it works for you.

Other people are more expressive and need to hear themselves “rant out loud” about their frustrations. This is typically done with a trusted friend in the form of a conversation.

The challenges come when you don’t have a trusted friend to vent to. Or you do have a good friend, but don’t want to reveal something embarrassing about your man or relationship.

If that’s your situation, then click here and vent privately to me — I will respond personally. No judgement. Total safe space. I got you.

Ok, so we understand it’s important to vent sometimes, right?

At least every once in a while. 

Venting “Just Right”

The key to an effective vent session, is to “go big or go home”. This is not a time for political correctness or sensitivity. Speak the dirty truth.

This is not a time for muted, downplayed feelings. Exaggerate rather than minimize. You want raw, authentic, emotional expression. Colorful language is a bonus.

It should feel almost like a Broadway performance.

How do you know when you’ve vented hard and long enough?

Easy, you feel “fresh and clean” emotionally afterward.

You can now joke about the topic without getting angry or offended. Your once passionate anger has been reduced to a mild irritation or less. You’re able to see other perspectives about the situation.

When done right, you only need to vent one good time for any grievance. One and done. On to the next one!

And with your new fresh feeling, comes fresh new possibilities. Possibilities for more happiness. More joy. More fun. Starting right now.

And with your emotionally present energy, you’ll be much sexier too.

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